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Friday, April 18, 2008

11:04AM

bedroom toys
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interesting huh lol

Current mood: amused

Thursday, December 6, 2007

4:29PM

wow I haven't updated since January? SO much has happened, I don't even know where to start. I guess the biggest thing is that I'm pregnant. We are due on February 7th and are very very excited. This is the only thing in my life I have wanted...ever. I had pretty much given up hope that it would ever happen and I was coming to terms with this. Then...pow it happened.

Current mood: cheerful

Saturday, January 27, 2007

7:12PM

Stole this one as well from Sun


1) Ever been to a strip club?
More than...lets just say I've been there your share of times too lol

2) Ever been to a bar?
a couple

3) Ever been kicked out of a bar or a club?
nope, I'm a good girl

4) Ever been so drunk you had to be carried out of somewhere?
Helped to everywhere yes...lol those were the days

5) Kissed someone of the same sex?
many many times :)

6) Thrown up from drinking too much?
once or so

7) Had sex in a car?
more than a few times

8) Had sex at the beach?
hhmm don't think so

9) Had sex in a movie theater?
well various sexual acts, not necessarly "sex" as such

10) Had sex in a bathroom?
yup yup lol

11) Had sex at work?
yeah....in the bosses chair, no not with the boss, amother various work environments

12) Have you ever been in an "adult" store?
just a bunch

13) Bought something from an adult store?
quite a few things

14) Have you spent over $100.00 in one visit to the adult store?
yeah....toys and such get expencive lol

15) Is there anyone on your friends list you would ever consider having sex with?
a few

17) Have you been caught having sex?
more than a few times

18) Are your breasts real?
last I checked

19) Have you ever kissed a stranger?
well I never just went up to someone I had not talked to before and kissed them, but I have made out with people after just meeting them.

20) Does anyone have naughty pics of you?
lol yeah...just...a few...*grin*

7:08PM

stolen from http://southernwitch69.livejournal.com/

You scored as Bondage. Your turn on is bondage... all out. You don't have a specific part of kinky sex that turns you on more than any other... everything working together turns you on. And why shouldn't it? Sex isn't sex without all the trimmings.

</td>

Bondage

92%

Whips

83%

Chains/Handcuffs

75%

Biting

67%

Blind Folds

50%

Blood

25%

What's Your Kinky Turn On?
created with QuizFarm.com



(like this is a big surprise)

Current mood: amused

Friday, September 1, 2006

9:46PM

Saturday, June 10, 2006

11:12PM

thats it....I'm tired, I'm hurting, I'm crying...I'm done

I just want to smile again. So I'm going away.

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

5:36PM - who knows

Maybe I'm letting go....maybe he is pushing me, maybe it is a combination of both. Today for instance we hardly said 5 words to eachother. I love him that will never change. But he doesn't want me and I need to accept that...so I'm accepting it. We are friends. He asked if friends could have sex together and not have it mean anything. I used to think so, hell I used to do it...maybe it depends on the friends? I said no. He said well what if they love eachother...well then it doesn't mean nothing does it?...I cried after...I want what he isn't able to give me atm, and if/when he is ready...I think it will be too late. Silly me if I need someone that wants to be with me and talk to me and such as much as I want to be with talk with them...
ah well I have lots more on my mind that I want to write but it isn't coming out right, so..another time.

Monday, April 3, 2006

6:14AM

You are my love, you are my life, My heart and soul the truest friend I've ever known, You are my world, all of my dreams, My fantasy, my reality, I love everything you are

Thursday, March 16, 2006

9:46AM

it has been forever since I wrote here. I feel the need now because my life has been....shattered. I am married. you all know that. I fell head over feet for Andy. I've been "with" him for hhmm...9 months or so
I've planned my life with this man. I still want these things. We invited a third into our relationship because of Me. I wanted her I love her. She isn't with us anymore. I don't even know if there is an US anymore. I'm lost. I got fired from the radio for this relationship. When it was none of their business. We never flaunted anything, We never threw it in anyone faces. I feel lost. Andy is leaving me I can feel it. He is supposed to be here tomorrow so we can meet and be together. He won't be here. He has left me too. maybe things are better this way but I can't see how. Maybe I should just get rid of this stupid machine?.....turn off the damn internet. I want to be happy, I want his arms around me, I want to feel his hands on me I want to touch him and kiss him and fall asleep next to him and wake next to him and raise a family with him. I WANT HIM. and yet he won't be here tomorrow. Is it ME? am I not worth loving? don't I deserve to be happy too? maybe it is better for all if I go away. I hurt everything I touch. I thought that time was over in my life. I hate this feeling sorry for myself but I can't help it right now. I'm lost, I'm scared, and I'm miserable. Why the hell am I here? Not one bit of anything good has come from me being here when I can't even be with the one that makes me happy. I know I'm not making those around me happy. I can't just turn away from the last over year of my life and pretend it all didn't happen. and I can't move away from it. I can't share any of this with my husband because honestly he isn't who I want to be with. I'm sitting here listening to music, tears rolling down my face. He is music to me, all music. I just want to get lost in his embrace and he is throwing me away. Why am I here? I know this is scattered and I'm sorry but that is how my brain is working right now. Andrew Smither I love you, and I want to share my life with you.....I want to spend my lifetime....loving you. please let me...please...I did nothing wrong but defend those I love...why is that wrong? why can't people just let others live and keep their noses in their own business? Where do these tears come from how can I still have any tears left? how can I let myself love....I've been hurt so often because I open myself too much why can't I learn? why can't I close off? I can't feel like this again, I can't lose everything again. I am 33 I should be happy. I should be able to be with who I want and where I want and be in love and....instead I'm 33 on my second marriage, again holding the fact I'm bi and the lifestyle I would like to be in...inside...and without the two people that helped to complete me. I hope that he suprises me and chooses me, chooses us. I hope...it is all I have left, but it is thinning. I'm scared, and lost and alone, I feel like a child so alone and scared afraid of the dark, all around me is darkness I can't find the light, I can see nothing, I'm walking around in a haze, I can't think beyond him. I thought everyone else was full of shit, we were gonna show them and now I don't care what happens after tomorrow if he isn't here. I thought so many things about this man and our relationship is that why it hurts so much? is that why i can't see through these tears? I can't read I can't sleep I can only cry, sit here, write and cry, listening to the music of our love....I'm scared. so scared.

Sunday, November 6, 2005

4:05PM

fire
Fire - Dominant

You're a very
confident and passionate person... You are a
warrior and will fight for those you
love...

Animagi form:
Phoenix

Most compatible with:
Air

Least compatible with:</b>
Water

Song: Angel -
Aerosmith

Ruling God: Ares


Are you an Obscure or Dominant Element?? {Great pics}
brought to you by Quizilla

Sunday, October 9, 2005

8:46AM - damn

The last time I updated was in July. Wow do I suck or what? Lets see what has been going on here shall we? I'm still DJ'ing and I love it mostly still. I love the DJ'ing part, I am getting fed up with the drama part behind the scenes. I've fallen head over feet for two people. Both of whom I "work" with at the radio. One is a gentleman from England who well we will see what happens. He is supposed to be coming out here soon. Well if he does then we will find out how we will get along huh. lol. The other is a lil chickie that I can't get out of my mind. I think of her constantly....and all the amazing things I want to do with her...the most innocent of which is just to fall asleep with her in my arms....the not so innocent part is making her make wonderful noises in my ear. However she is even further away than England so blah. Doesn't mean we aren't on eachothers mind ALL the damn time though.
D and I aren't doing well. Sometimes we do great and other times well...we just don't. He gets mad at me constantly and yells, but doesn't if that makes any sense to anyone other than me. I know it is a form of abuse and I know I am miserable but...this is my second marriage. I feel like a total failure.
I was supposed to go to the castle reunion this past August....didn't get there my car somehow broke the week or so before, thanks to my husband. How sweet huh, if he didn't want me to go he could have just said so. Who knows whats gonna happen next. I am hoping and trying and such to get to ohio for halloween. CS does a huge halloween thing and well I LOVE halloween. we will see.

hhmm not much else right now...I'm sure there is but well yeah lol.

~Q

Current mood: awake

Saturday, July 23, 2005

4:15PM - update

Well it has been quite a while. Lots has happened. It is hot and humid and yucky outside, but I did finally convince the powers that be to get me a pool....so it is filling up as I type this, I've been thrown in a few times already. I so love the water :)
I sat down and had a serious talk with my husband a week or so ago. Didn't go like I had intended. I told him I'm not happy and that I'm stopping taking the pills to get pregnant for now. I asked if we could go to therapy, he said no. My biggest issue is sex...I know it is "just sex" but if you say that then you don't know me lol. I figure I can find friendship and someone to talk to or do stuff with in anyone...but the only person I'm supposed to have sex with is him....so stop saying no damnit. But he knows my thoughts on that subject and told me that that part of our lives will not improve. He doesn't want to even try to make that better. I'm thinking...I'm not meant to be married. I really should have been born wealthy so I didn't have to work or get married. I'm not sure where to go from here. My sister im'd me today asking what was wrong, I played dumb she said "Kimmie, daddie and I both know there is something wrong. When you don't talk to us we know so spill" lol....gotta love Sarah. I told her, she was understanding. I just hate this feeling that I fucked up once again. I hope D wakes up and realizes whats going on here. It feels like little bits of me are dying. I hate that I have turned to other means to feel...loved, desired and satisified. I haven't cheated yet...stress yet...
hhmm what else...made a few quilts...working on the radio one.
I am still dj'ing and I love it...it is the coolest thing ever...I think just lots of fun, and I guess they are happy with me and what I'm doing so its all good.
I can't get into my league room. I'm so not happy about that, I miss everyone so bad. but about uumm a month or so ago the room stopped letting me in. I can get into other yahoo games, just not that one and I don't know why. I've tried everything I can think of. I will keep trying. I hate feeling do disconnected. :(
well I guess thats it I'm gonna go order some wings or something for din din. don't feel like cooking.

oh and my boobies....are gonna get freckles lol....for some reason I end up with no top on when I'm out near the pool. I swear my boobies have never seen this much sun before.

ok thats it now. :)

Current mood: disappointed

Monday, May 23, 2005

12:16PM - previous post

I'm just confused about those things I don't know. thats all, just confused...hard to explain I think.

Sunday, May 22, 2005

6:40PM

? so....confused

Tuesday, May 3, 2005

7:18PM

for those that care and are on my friends list there is a friends only update just before this. sshh secrets...*grin*


Read more...Collapse )

Current mood: devious

Monday, March 14, 2005

1:04PM

What your LJ friends do on a Saturday night by eloisasnape
username
Favourite sexual position
Gets drunk and trashes friends' LJsstudio3dom
Dances naked in the moonlightcharmed_nay
Reads p0rnmakin_lemonaide
Goes out to 'work' on the streetsdlyman29
Writes erotica about a certain Potions Mastersouthernwitch69
Eats raw liverkiwi_witch_69
Sucks own nipplesyummy
Waxes bikini linedodgy_wytch
Quiz created with MemeGen!



With Which Harry Potter Male Are You Most Sexually Compatible?

brought to you by Quizilla

Saturday, March 5, 2005

8:42AM

Sex Survey
Number of Sexual Partners: Kissing/Touching31ish give or take.....
Number of Sexual Partners: Oral Sex28
Number of Sexual Partners: Intercourse25ish
Have you ever been involved in a threesome?yes
Have you ever been involved in an orgy?no
Have you ever been paid for sex?no
Have you ever paid someone else for sex?no
Have you ever had sex with a man?yes
Have you ever had sex with a woman?yes
Have you ever been tied up for sexual purposes?yes
Do you enjoy biting, scratching, etc.?yes
Have you ever fantasized about a friend of yours?yes
Have you ever followed through with that fantasy?yes
Are you still on speaking terms with your first sexual partner?no
What was their name?depends on exactly what you mean by first
Have you ever exposed yourself to a stranger?yes
Have you ever had a one night stand?no
Have you ever had a mercyfuck?yes
Have you ever had sex and then not called back?yes
Have you ever not been called back?no
Do you regret any sexual encounters?no
Would you identify as a "slut"?uumm, not at the moment
Do you think being a "slut" (by your definition) is a bad thing?no
Do you believe in monogamy?yes....
Do you believe in soulmates?yes
What is the youngest age of a person you would consider sleeping with?18
And the oldest?55
What celebrities do you look at lustfully?hhmm there are quite a few....
And finally, what is your favorite color?Purple of course

CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

Wednesday, March 2, 2005

8:16AM

What do people really think about you?
by Raven319
Name
Age
favorite song
Parents thinkYou're sleeping around
Strangers thinkYou have bigger boobs than Pam
Friends thinkYou're wonderful
Quiz created with MemeGen!

Monday, February 28, 2005

9:05PM

Your love is... by ChibiMarronchan
Your name is...
Your kiss is...breath taking
Your hugs are...warm
Your eyes...burn into my heart
Your touch is...awakening my heart
Your smell is...exotic
Your smile is...amazing
Your love is...one of a kind
Quiz created with MemeGen!

Sunday, February 27, 2005

11:34AM - see I suck at this updating thing

yesterday we went to the mini T races, Derrick won 2nd, should have been first if one of the other guys was driving properly he got all messed up right in from of Derrick and caused him to crash in the last 15 seconds so that kinda sucked but then D was in the dash for cash race and he kicked ass. Got 1st place in that one anyway. Then we went to the RV show, it was on the way home, we walked through all these beautiful rv's....wow....There are some that are just so over the top. We were coming out of one and a salesperson accousted us.....asked us if we had an rv currently....we both laughed. cause we do but not on the lines he was thinking, we have a very old 1968 or 9 teardrop inspired camper, in amazing shape, it is only 10 foot though so it is perfect for the two of us and when we have very small kids....it does have two beds so it isn't too bad. Then as we were leaving we were walking through the parkinglot and I slipped and fell, all my weight on my left knee and it jarred my foot at an odd angle my my whole body hurts and aches yucky.
Last night we got home and hubby opened a bottle of wine for himself he drank the ENTIRE thing....he gets drunk easy, he was so messed up....He was kinda frisky, my fault really I had us looking at porn anyway I had turned my cam on and he knew it and my camerashy hubby pulled his cock out and had me suck him in front of the camera....I was impressed.....of course nobody was watching, but that really isn't the point. Then I said my goodnights and went off to bed and well yeah you know.....we had amazing sex....my leg was not thrilled with me but I do have needs. Then we go to sleep and I'm woken up my fingers trying to get inside me....I'm like uumm ok guess he is horney again, so I help him out and we do it again in the middle of the night, after I had him a towell and he cleans off and rolls over and goes back to sleep, I asked him if he was ok he said yes. This morning I talked to him about it, he has no memory of it at all...must have been really drunk to not remember....either that or it wasn't very good....but I do remember and I know that isn't the case. Hell I even came and that isn't an everytime occourance. now I'm home waiting for him to get home from work, he had to go in for a couple hours. My leg is in so much pain, I'm not sure how to make it better, only time I suppose.
Ok I think that is it for now, I'll write more at some point.
Blessed Be.
~me


Your Harry Potter Character Description
Name
Age
HP Obsession Level
Year at Hogwarts Four
Corporeal Patronus form Unicorn
Special magical abilities Legilimens (Er...don't sense my thoughts, I'm visualizing you nekkid...)
Preferred field of study Occlumency
Character you'd most likely end up dating Sirius Black
Popularity at Hogwarts - 93%
This cool quiz by nicki - Taken 28891 Times.
</a>
New - Kwiz.Biz Astrology

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